Quizzer #2: Bonk

1. Why do you think Roach only chose to write about people with spinal injuries having orgasms, instead of people with other disabilities?

I think the main reason she chose to write about people with spinal cord injuries is because with those people how do you know what they feel and if they can even maintain a healthy sexual life. I think she was interested in that subject and wanted to bring it to the general public. People with spinal cord injuries are usually paralyzed, and aren’t suppose to feel anything, but often can feel an orgasm, it just may be in a different place and a different way. I also think if she wrote about people with other disabilities it would be less effective because you think “oh those people should be able to have sex”, but with spinal cord injuries you think “oh they are paralyzed from the waist down so they must not be able to have sexual intercourse. I think it was great that instead of just writing about normal healthy people, she also took the time to research how people with disabilities do it. That helps the general public understand more and also people with spinal injuries that they can have an effective orgasm they just need to be directed in the right way.

2. How do you think the people with spinal injuries benefited from having Roach write about how they deal with sexual encounters?

I think it was a great idea for Roach to write about them, because as she mentioned in the book is that many couples that have a disability like that don’t know where to go, don’t know who to look toward for help in that subject. I think personally I would be embarrassed to talk with people and I think by her including them in her book that people with these disabilities can come forward for help so that they can experience sex like they should be able to in a healthy and positive manner. I think they also benefited because not only is more research being done for them, but they are learning new stuff for people with sexual dysfunction in every kind of manner. It was brave of her to write about such a touchy subject in the first place, but to also include the research being done on people with disabilities is an even greater step that was probably help the general population that do have disabilities.

3. Why do you think Roach mentions in the chapter title of 12, that women are complicated?

I think first off, through her whole research she found women are complicated, but she directs they are complicated in the areas of sex. One reason I believe she says they are complicated is that you can’t tell when a woman is aroused. Men they have physical proof that they are aroused because you can see the obvious erection of the male. In females you can’t see that they are the most likely have to voice it if they are and many women either say they are when they aren’t or just pretend to be. That makes the whole sexual experience complicated. Another thing that Roach mentions about women being complicated is that women can’t focus on just sex. When they are having sex they can be thinking about numerous things like work, kids, problems in their life. While the men just focus on how good they want the sex to be and just about the sex. I also think maybe she says this in her book because of the men readers so that they are more apt to please their partner during sex because of how complicated they can be.

4. Do you think that erectile dysfunction and female sex dysfunction are physical or psychological?

For me I think it is more psychological than physical. Often men and women are so apt about pleasing their partner and how they look that they don’t just go and enjoy the sex. They have so much anxiety built up that they aren’t focused on the deed itself but other things and often this leads to low self esteem and not a whole lot happening in bed. This also brings the issue of drugs saying they can make things better and get rid of the sexual dysfunction. They have Viagra for a man, which is proven to work, but not a whole lot for women to use. This is a reason to think it is also physical too because your body ages and of course things don’t work like they should, but I think people over analyze things and assume things too quickly. I know the book mentions that often it is more of a physical reason in men and then psychological reason in women to have sexual dysfunction maybe that is how it works, but I do think a majority of it is psychological.